--
I've
been having a hard time finding my rhythm. That isn't really new. In fact, I think I say that at the beginning of every school year, the beginning of every summer, the beginning of every new season.
Motherhood in particular, and life in general, both seem to be characterized by irregular time signatures, and I frequently scramble to
adjust to those odd beats. Above and beyond the usual oddities, new things are
swirling all over my schedule these days and the tempo has moved up a few
notches on the metronome. This has the effect of putting me in a mild state of
panic when something unexpected happens. I've just found the beat . . . okay, there it is, I can do this. I'm
concentrating like crazy to stay on it now that I've found it, and then, out of
the blue, someone throws in an impromptu stop, or points at me for a solo, or
the time signature changes without warning and I'm afraid the whole audience
will hear me missing beats and flubbing my part until I make the adjustment, IF
I'm good enough to make the adjustment that is. (Maybe Drummer Boy can help me sort it
out. He does this all the time like it's nothing--he can even twirl his sticks in the process!)
This time of change for me is all
a little thrilling and terrifying, and sometimes just downright funny. The
trick is to notice the humor in the moments when I'm flailing--I'm not always
so good at that. I don't like to feel out of sync. I don't like to feel like I'm back on my heels. I don't like
thinking about what the critics might say ("The
band was amazing, all except for the drummer who couldn't find a rhythm to save
her life! GET A NEW DRUMMER!")
From one day to the next, sometimes from one hour to the next, I don't know what my time will look like. Even when I think I know, there is always the potential for the unexpected. Seasons like this-- when the rhythm is hard to find-- are wonderful for developing our flexibility, and the ability to trust our Band Leader. He is never thrown by the funny rhythms of our lives and He always knows how to make it all into music, even when we lose our place and get off the beat.
Father, please fill me with Your calm assurance, and provide me with the skill required for the rhythms I need to play in these wonderful and challenging days, in this very special season. Please take my faltering and somehow make music out of it all as only You can do!
Do you ever feel caught off-guard by life's funny rhythms?
P.S. While I adjust to all the newness of being back in school and new work and school schedules for both my kids, I ask your patience with any inconsistencies on my part in posting. I pray that I will settle in before long and will be able to stay on track with my blog publishing schedule, but if I don't post as regularly as I aspire to do, please bear with me. Thank you so much for being here!
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Joining Ann Voskamp in counting His graces for her Multitudes on Monday
I hope you'll join in if you haven't already!
In the counting of the endless gifts I say with C. S. Lewis,
"This also is Thou!"
Counting my next 1000 Gifts, joining Ann in The Joy Dare--like a scavenger hunt for graces, gifts and glory!! Wanna come along? I dare ya!!
The continuing JOY DARE:
#1085-1105 (January 29th through February 4th)
29. a song heard--"Water Tower Town" by Scotty McCreery--yeah, I'm from one of those!
a soft word--"Thanks Mom."
where you saw light--our shed, all cleaned out, light shining deep inside
30. 3 old things seen new
heirlooms that are on the wall every day, but whose stories She So Sweet had not heard
cassette tape of an old performance with an old friend, and reconnecting--JOY!
the framed piece of my high school gym floor that fills me with precious memories
31. a gift found on a paper-- wonderful thoughts on writing by Max Lucado, sent to me by Momma & Daddy
in a person--Momma & Daddy's call to wish me a happy first day of school!
in a picture--Grandma Fagen, wearing the watch that is my touchstone of inspiration
1. a gift found at 11:30 AM, at 2:30 PM and 6:30 PM
11:30 AM--Hero Husband & She So Sweet on their way to her school where he spoke for her Christian club
2:30 PM--Walking out of first meeting with She So Sweet's new Independent Study teacher thinking she was hand-picked, tailor-made just for her!!
6:30 PM--Being able to offer a ride home to Lois, a dear friend who does so much for us
2. 3 things overheard today, all gifts
Barista at Peet's greeting every single customer with a cheery, "How you doin' this morning?"
My kids' laughter
Hero Husband to She So Sweet, "I'm so glad you're mine!"
3. 3 gifts found in writing
my own voice
having to think clearly enough to put thoughts into words
discipline
4. 3 gifts found when bent down
the strength to get back up (even with a misbehaving knee)
humility
warm blankets, fresh from the dryer
A heartfelt thank you to these generous bloggerswho make these communities available!
